Not to say I have particularly high expectations of objectivity from a New York Times opinion piece, but this worthless dreck could have been penned by a high school kid on an acid trip, and still made more sense:

Free Melania – From Our Expectations

It’s been a while since I’ve had a good fisk, so let’s begin, shall we?

WASHINGTON — Now, stacked on the Trump tower of petrifying things we have to worry about — war with Iran, war with China, war with Mexico, war with Islam, war with koala bears — there is yet another looming disaster.

War with koala bears. Cute. But look at the bright side. Since we elected Trump over Hillary, at least we’re not going to war with Russia. So we have that going for us, which is nice.

The East Wing is perilously behind in planning for the Easter Egg Roll. Is the White House dropping the ball — or rather, the ovoid?

Har har har. I know the political Left has had a hard time with comedy lately, what with their wholesale embracing of Political Correctness and all. But come on. Is this the best you could do?

The Times’s Julie Hirschfeld Davis wrote about the anguish of anonymous D.C. sources who fear the annual egg roll and other “elaborate White House events that are among the heaviest tasks for first ladies” are languishing in the deserted East Wing, as are unanswered requests for White House tours.

I’m just going to put this out there: does anybody care? I mean, the author tells us about all these wars Trump is supposedly going to start, and then wants to discuss the annual egg roll as a matter of cosmic importance.

While Melania plays Rapunzel in her Fifth Avenue tower, Steve Bannon is reveling in his role as the troll under the bridge. Beauty and the Beast.

Okay. What does Bannon have to do with the annual egg roll? I thought this was supposed to be about Melania, not lobbing insults at figures that have nothing to do with your chosen topic? The butthurt is strong with this one.

At least Dick Cheney, another mad scientist who hated multilateral relations and preached hegemony, waited until he had started a bogus war and smashed the globe before he embraced the nickname Darth Vader. Bannon calls himself that while he stirs the pot, noting that “darkness is good” and that Darth and Satan had real power.

I thought we were done with Bush Derangement Syndrome now that Trump Derangement Syndrome (a much more virulent disease) had come to the fore? Supposedly not. Dick Cheney must have done something right if the author wants to interrupt her own piece to insult him.

As the elegant Melania scorns the East Wing, the grungy Bannon reigns in the West Wing, where late into the night he plots his Manichaean schemes to blow up everything with trade wars, real wars and battles against the Islamic “caliphate.” He blithely sits at the center like Jabba the Hutt as the slapdash White House sews strife, chaos and cruelty, putting out executive orders restricting immigration and rolling back financial regulations on Wall Street — a move that will hurt the very blue-collar Americans Trump pledged to protect.

Now this is a piece of work here. See, blue-collar Americans aren’t stupid, no matter how often you call them that in your media hit pieces. They know a carpetbagger when they see one, and Hillary fit the bill well enough. Immigration is interesting. If illegals are coming in, and getting the construction jobs because they are cheaper (partly because we actually subsidize them through government spending), blue-collar workers understand that this is depressing their own wages, and taking jobs away that might have been theirs if illegal immigration and the welfare state weren’t unbalancing the scales.

And you can’t really tell them any different, and expect them to believe you, because they’ve seen the number of illegals increase rapidly, and their own jobs shrink, or pay less. They can see the direct relationship. As for rolling back regulation on Wall Street, well it’s interesting that this is how the author sees it. Wall Street donated mostly to Hillary, not Trump. And there’s a reason for this… many of the regulations actually protect Wall Street and large corporations from competition by smaller companies and business owners, who can’t afford regulatory compliance.

I read Trump’s The Art of the Deal book, and one of the takeaways from that is just how much regulation there really is, and how corrupt government is. You see Trump navigate a labyrinth of political cronies, regulations, arcane Kafkan laws, just because he wants to build a building. Trump could afford to hire a team to help him do this. John Doe off the street is screwed.

I’m more worried about Trump’s presence in the White House than Melania’s absence. Whether or not she intends it, the woman who calls herself “a full-time mom” is making a modern statement about the role of the first lady. She’s saying: I’ll do it on my terms.

“Never since Abigail Adams has a first lady not lived in the White House from Day 1 — if they were alive and well,” said Kate Andersen Brower, author of “First Women: The Grace and Power of America’s Modern First Ladies.”

Now, if you know your Leftist agitprop, you should know precisely where they are going with this. But at least the author is admitting the focus on easter egg rolls is ridiculous.

The reason it would have been so delicious to see Bill Clinton in the first lady role is that it would have illustrated starkly just how antiquated the white satin music box is. The man who knew every detail of the Irish and Middle East peace processes would not have been expected to simply read books to schoolchildren on trips abroad or deal with flowers for state dinners.

Yeah… about that. Giving tacit credit to Bill Clinton for the Irish peace process is dumb, and obviously his much-acclaimed Middle East peace didn’t work out so well. After all, it’s still a disaster today. He couldn’t even get the Israelis and Palestinians to stop shooting at each other.

“We do not know if she would call herself a feminist, but in a weird way it’s a strangely feminist thing to do. It’s gutsy not to move there until she’s ready.”

There it is. The agitprop we’ve been waiting for. They want to cast Melania as one of their own, a feminist-in-hiding, a secret member of #TheResistance. They tried to do the same with Ivanka, making all sorts of bizarre accusations, like Donald Trump had the hots for his daughter, or that she secretly hated him. This then becomes more ammunition for the Left’s assumption that Trump hates women, and all the women in his life secretly hate him back.

Here’s more of the same:

A #FreeMelania meme thrives and Paul Rudnick is conjuring “Melania’s Diary” in The New Yorker, in which she went to the Women’s March incognito and chanted, “Keep your tiny hands off my reproductive rights!” They even wonder if her first-lady project choice, fighting cyberbullies, is a sly slap at her cyberbullying husband.

Pure liberal fantasy. Put the crack pipe down, please.

For this administration, there’s a better use for the empty East Wing: Move in the first First Shrink.

Another failed attempt at Leftist humor. They are really bad at this. I mean, I’m old enough to remember when Sarah Silverman was actually funny, instead of a lunatic calling for a military coup. The Left conquered the cultural establishment, the schools, media, TV, athletic leagues, etc… But upon taking them over, their rigorous application of Political Correctness removed the very things that made them great. Now schools teach bullshit, media peddles lies, the TV is filled with vapid nonsense, and the NFL is more worried about appearing pro-Feminist and whether or not the name of the Washington Redskins is racist…

Fortunately, I’m not so old as to remember a time before the New York Slimes was the propaganda arm of the Democrat Party. That’s been pretty consistent throughout most of my life. Though, I’m guessing even Pravda probably had a better grasp of humor than these morons.

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