Vox’s post at Alpha Game Plan, itself a reblogging of Mike Cernovich’s original, is very important.

As you work to improve yourself, one thing that you will find is that the world can be divided into three groups of people.

  1. Those who are indifferent to you. This is the vast majority of people out there.
  2. Those who will support you. This is, by far, the smallest group.
  3. Those who will attempt to tear you down. This group isn’t huge, but it can be alarming to discover who is in it.

It’s not just miserable people who will try to prevent you from improving yourself. Your wife or your girlfriend may feel threatened by feeling that you are moving out of her league and try to sabotage you. If you’ve got a Gamma father, he may belittle your efforts and attempt to make you feel as if your efforts are pointless. If you’ve got female friends, they may attempt to “put you in your place” or “let the air out of you”. Your male acquaintances may even try to physically keep you in your place in the socio-sexual hierarchy to prevent themselves sliding below you.

That’s why Cernovich is right to tell you to ruthlessly cut them out of your life. It doesn’t matter if they are friends or family, if they can’t even manage to be neutral towards your efforts at self-improvement, they have to go. There is a word for someone who actively attempts to hinder your efforts and make your life worse, and that word is enemy.

Regardless of where you stand on Vox Day’s politics, this is important life advice. You need to step back and evaluate those in your life. If they cannot rise to at least neutral, you need to rid yourself of them and their influence on you. You will be happier for it.

Furthermore, sometimes confrontation or isolation is what is needed to remind people in your life that you are valuable, and that they must respect you. I’ve had a few people return to a positive balance with me, so to speak, by simply reminding them that I will not tolerate mistreatment.

Others are unsalvageable, of course. Getting rid of them will be a net improvement on your life. Step back and think on those in your life and where they stand. But also remember that it behooves you to be a positive influence on those who are good to you. I sometimes fail to appreciate my friends and family enough, and this is as good a reminder as any to do that.

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